Sometimes though, I do lose sight of these things. Being home is only hard because Japan is far away - really the same reason being in Japan was hard. **If anyone could invent a working teleportation device, I would give up my first born.**
So what am I doing now? It's a natural question, but comes with a certain amount of stress. Now, I am doing the job search thing - but not as productive with this task as I could be. I have no excuse and I don't intend to think one up. Simply, I am trying my hardest to feel comfortable in my own skin again and comfortable living in the room in which I grew up. I am taking all parts of growing up and being an adult at my own pace. Ultimately, I trust myself and my abilities to find a job and continue on with my life.
In this transition lives many emotions. This is something I was expecting, and not something that I can explain; so I won't try. I will continue to write this blog and share my thoughts and experiences and as much of my emotion as I can with you. Writing has a great healing power in my life, and something that I need to do in order to remain clear-headed.
Have patience with me or don't. Keep reading or don't. Don't expect me to live up to your expectations - I am struggling with my own right now.
2 comments:
Starting over is always tough. I can't relate to the same extent as your year in Japan, but I know how frustrating it can get to leave something you've made for yourself with which you have become comfortable. It takes a lot of patience, but eventually the pieces come together. Glad you're writing again.
painting can also help! I'm not a painter - not even close - but i have to say that's its very theraputic to throw color on a page. or sing at the top of my lungs in the car or the shower - I've also found lately that while i've always loved walking - now it brings with it some sense of peace and my brain just works thru stuff and most of the time let's it go into the trees and grass and sky around me as i walk. BB gave me this new expression - let it flow thru you - the emotions, the stress, everything. persoanly? i finder it a LOT easier to say than do - but walking into the wind helps. making it physical somehow helps me let go. everyone is different of course, but these have been working for me lately so i wanted to share in case 1 of them can help you too. love you so much and so happy to have you at cell phone reach :-)
ps - friends can sometimes save your world :huge hug: thank you
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